The first thing to note is, the salaries of minor-league baseball players are a joke. If McDonald’s paid its people what Major League Baseball pays its low minor-leaguers, nobody would ever get fries with that. Biggie-sized life as we know it would cease to exist. Try finding somebody, anybody to greet you at Walmart.

Who makes more money at a minor-league game than a minor-leaguer? Everybody. Everybody makes more money, per hour. Ticket takers, scoreboard operators, public address announcers, official scorers. Groundskeepers, team publicists. Mascots. The person in the dragon suit makes more.

A kid playing in Class A at, say, the Reds’ affiliate in Billings, MT, can expect to earn $1,100 a month, for a season that started June 17 and ends Sept. 8. That comes to approximately $3,200 a year. He does not get paid in the offseason. He will not get paid in spring training.

He might be asked to attend the Arizona Fall League, where he will get living expenses, but no salary. So, between Sept. 8 this year and next May or June, the player gets paid zip in his chosen profession.

Players have a problem with that.

Major League Baseball, a $9 billion industry, has a problem with their problem.

Maybe you’ve heard of the Save America’s Pastime Act, a bogus bill with a shrieking-panic name, currently under consideration in the House of Representatives. It is the legislative answer to a lawsuit whose authors want Baseball to comply with the Fair Labor Standards Act that requires workers be paid the federal minimum wage of $7.25 an hour. It’s only been on the books the last 80 years.

House Bill 5580 asks that minor-league baseball players be exempt from that act.  MLB pays the salaries of its minor-leaguers. Why on earth should a $9 billion industry be expected to pay its future players $7.25 an hour? Do these players think their bosses are rich or something?

I know, I hear you: These are kids, most of them. Some are fresh out of high school. Some are Latino, from countries where $3,500 for five months work is extraordinary. That doesn’t mean any of them should have to live below poverty level while working in an industry that’s never been wealthier. That sounds like something we did in this country 200 years ago, and fought a war over.

I’ve seen these kids. They go to Denny’s, buy an $8 Grand Slam Slugger breakfast and split it two ways, at least. They go to all-you-can-eat buffets with plastic containers. You think you eat a lot of Ramen?

Baseball thinks this is OK. In fact, Baseball wants you to believe that if it has to pay its minor-leaguers a living wage, it will mean the end of lots of minor-league teams. Major-league clubs will have to pass on the costs of paying every player $7.25 an hour. The minor-league teams will collapse under weight. Especially if Baseball is ordered to pay back money owed to retired players.

Louisville Bats president Gary Ulmer said this, earlier this week:

“Should the litigation be successful, teams like the Louisville Bats, Bowling Green Hot Rods and Lexington Legends may well disappear, along with a source of wholesome entertainment for Kentucky families, and an economic generator for those cities.”

Well OK, but according to Forbes magazine, via Yahoo!, the Bats had $4.3 million in operating income – i.e. operating profit – last year. Highly tidy, by minor-league standards.

I wanted to talk with a few members of the Dayton Dragons, the Reds’ Class A team up I-75, about the potential joys of making minimum wage. I needed Reds OK for that. Not granted. I wanted to talk with Reds General Manager Dick Williams about it. He didn’t respond to a text message.

I’ve seen a few reports estimating that the cost of $7.25-an-hour respect would be $2 million a team, max. That’s peanuts. It’s Joey Votto’s pro-rated take for about six weeks.

Some minor-leaguers don’t need it. If this year, you were drafted in the 20th round or higher, maybe your signing bonus will see you through 12 months. Though even those numbers vary widely. A person familiar with the numbers confirmed that one team paid an 11th-rounder $5,000 to sign, while another team paid its 14th-round pick $100,000.

If you’re Nick Senzel, the Reds’ 1st-round pick and No. 2 overall, these words aren’t for you. If you’re Ty Blankmeyer, their 36th-round pick, they most certainly are.

Regardless, Baseball needs to do something, and has for a long time. Instead of acknowledging that fact, Baseball fights it with legislation which if passed would kill the lawsuit. Maybe the $9 Billion Boys could toss a few nickels in the minor-leaguer’s cup. Or at least help find him an offseason job that pays actual money.        Greed isn’t pretty.