The Philadelphia Eagles got embarrassed on Thanksgiving.
There’s no other way to put it. They got totally humiliated by the Detroit Lions, who entered the game 3-7. If the Eagles had won the game, they’d be right there in the mix for the NFC East. They lost 45-14, and this seems crazy to write but it wasn’t even that close. They were overmatched on both sides of the ball. They had no answers for Calvin Johnson, who caught a touchdown pass whenever he was in the mood, and they made Matthew Stafford look like the greatest QB who ever lived.
It was an embarrassment, and it underscores a sad truth: Philadelphia is the saddest pro sports city in America right now.
Some caveats, before everyone yells at me on Twitter: I am only speaking about pro sports cities, i.e. cities with pro sports. I agree that people in Twin Falls, Idaho have no pro sports, and thus are probably a sadder pro sports city. But for a city like Philadelphia, with a proud pro sports tradition and teams in all the four major sports, things are dire right now.
The Eagles we already discussed, but they’ll probably finish 6-10, which is just enough wins to give ownership pause about firing Chip Kelly. That should worry Eagles fans. I like Chip Kelly, but I like him more as the next coach of LSU than the coach of a pro football team.
The Phillies have been a laughingstock in MLB for several years, and are only now digging themselves out of the massive, Ryan Howard-filled hole they’ve been living in for quite some time. There’s hope there, finally, but this is a team that won the fewest games in all of Major League Baseball this year and watched the division rival New York Mets just go to the World Series with the most talented young rotation in baseball. Things aren’t exactly sunshine and moonbeams in Citizens Bank Park.
The 76ers are in year 32 of their rebuild (it feels like that, anyway) and are the sixth team in NBA history to start out a season 0-16. The “process” that GM Sam Hinkie has implored his fans to trust is getting old. There are young players on the team to get excited about. Jahlil Okafor and Nerlens Noel are real talents, I like Nik Stauskas and I think Joel Embiid can be good if he ever gets healthy.
But will it be on the 76ers? I doubt it. Hinkie is stockpiling assets with no care about how they fit or play together. He’s stashing players in Europe, acquiring tradable assets, just waiting for that one star to take the franchise to the next level. But what star will want to play in Philadelphia? And if they miss out on winning the draft lottery, what’s the plan then? (Also, Okafor was just reportedly involved in a street fight in Boston. Good times!)
The bright spot in Philly sports right now are the Flyers, who have some young talent and they work hard. They also are tied for the fewest wins in the entire NHL and currently have 19 points, good for second-to-last place in the Metropolitan.
This is Allison J. describing the team at Broad Street Hockey: “The Flyers kinda suck, yes. But they are like the sweet, adorable new puppy that pees in your shoes. You love them anyhow.” That’s the most exciting team in Philly right now!
Actually, because why not, the Philadelphia Union of MLS just finished the season second-to-last in the Eastern Conference and finished second-to-last in points for the entire MLS, with 10 wins and 17 losses on the season. The highlight of their season this year was the fan-made video “memorializing” the 17 goalkeepers who’ve played for the team.
There are bad situations in other cities, for sure. But Philadelphia deserves better than this. They have proud fans (some of whom may be terrible people) but they’re loyal. These fans care. And they deserve better than what this city is giving them right now.
Fight on Philadelphia, good times are coming soon.