Just like that, Deflategate is over.
A scant 18 months after the Patriots beat the Indianapolis Colts 45-7 in the 2015 AFC Championship Game, Tom Brady finally halted legal proceedings and agreed to accept a four-game suspension for his alleged role in the alleged deflating of footballs.
A year and a half we talked about this. We talked about who knew what, what needles were used to deflate what balls in what bathrooms, what certain text messages sent to certain ball boys meant.
We poked apart theories, studied the ideal gas law, pored over the intricacies of the CBA and debated freedom of speech, rights to digital privacy, due process, on and on.
I hesitate to say this because we live in a ridiculous country, but I think it’s very possible: There has never, in the history of the United States of America, been more time spent by more people thinking about something so incredibly stupid.
Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports
It’s been 18 months of this. Eighteen months! There have been court cases and judges and reporters filing thousands upon thousands of words over a game the Patriots won 45-7. They won it 45-7! Even the Colts thought this was stupid, and they thought it was stupid two days after it happened!
Do I think Tom Brady did something out of line? I don’t even remember. I have no idea how I feel about this any more. I’ve forgotten all the facts. I just don’t care. Whatever. Give him a two-game suspension, give him a four-game suspension, whatever. The Patriots are gonna go 3-1 under Jimmy Garoppolo anyway and it’ll be over.
Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports
When sports fans a hundred years from now read up on this, they won’t believe it was real. They’ll think the entire American sports world pulled a prank on the people of the future. “There was an 18-month saga over whether or not some footballs had a little less air in them than other footballs in a blowout game?”
Yes, people of the future. That’s what happened. We spent a year and a half of our lives as a sporting nation debating the PSI of footballs. A story that we should have spent an afternoon on.
It’s over now. I don’t even know how to feel. Relief I guess? Disappointment the lunacy can’t continue? I have no idea. I can’t remember what I’m supposed to think about this anymore. This has been so incredibly stupid. Goodbye, Deflategate. It’s been surreal.
